lover_of_shoes

John and I drove down to Austin for the weekend Oct. 10-12.
We stayed with my Ally friend and had our pictures taken by the lovely Leah Muse.
( Here are the results: )

I'm in love.
With the pictures.
And John, too.

Also, check out our wedding website!
Because I'm cool like that!

I can hardly believe it myself, but Mom helped me place an offer on a house a few weeks ago, and although there were a few bumps along the way, the seller signed the contract yesterday and the precious house will be ours in less than six weeks! It all happened so fast, but I'm so stinkin' excited to move.

It's a two bedroom, two bath home in the azalea district, built in the 1940's. The kitchen was recently remodeled and there's a new roof. The master bedroom is painted blue and real hardwood floors are laid throughout. There's the cutest deck in the little backyard and a nice carport and it couldn't be more perfect!

Although he'll leave to go on tour less than a week before we move in, which is totally lame, John and I talked yesterday about all our plans for decorating and we're both soreallyvery excited to get moved in and make it our own! But, it will just give me an excuse to throw my whole self into making it perfect by the time he's home for Christmas.

I suppose now would also be a good time to mention news on the job front. My last day at the oil & gas office was one week ago today. BSCENE offered me a paid position there which I just couldn't turn down. The owners and editors there say they really enjoy working with me and will offer a full time position after I graduate on Dec. 20. And even if I hate it, TWW said the door will always be open to me should I decide to return. So, job security. Stability. It's a good thing.

These next few weeks will not be easy, but at least I have exciting times to look forward to. Not only do I currently live with four guys in a band, their manager is coming to work with them for most of the month before recording and tour, so that will make five stinky dirty boys in my presence. I've given up on trying to keep a clean house, it's just wasted effort.

Now if I can just make it through the month of November with my sanity still in tact....
I'll be moved into my new house before the holidays! Yipeeeee!

Some really major decisions are coming up in life right now. Doesn't life know that I'm indecisive? And I get really stressed and irritable about said major decisions? And that even after I make the decision, I'll still wonder what if...?

So, here's asking for a little help from my dear friends.

Would you rather...
(a) have a job you enjoy that pays the bills and then some and then some?
(b) have a job you love that pays the bills (ish)?

That's one of a few decisions in the queue.
And no, John is not directly involved in any of them.
Wedding plans are happily underway.

We actually had our engagement photo shoot with Leah this last weekend in Austin. I, again, had trouble making a decision about what to wear. Luckily John came through and narrowed it down for me. Fun was had. I felt like a model. A really awkard model that giggles a lot. And has a boy in the picture with her that's trying hard not to look miserable.

So, get back to me about that scenario I just threw at you.
It's important.

Have you watched this show on TLC?
It amuses me. As does Rock the Reception. Fun times.
John & I should plan something totally out of character...

Mom, sister, friend & I went dress shopping in Dallas today.
We started off at Blush Couture in uptown. I fell in love with a $1900 gown.
Went to Neiman Marcus a la recommendation of my hair stylist. Mom fell in love with a $4000 gown.
Went to Terry Costa. Found a $500 gown that made me "look hot," said sister.

The logical part of my brain says, "WTF, a $2000 dress?!? Don't do it. It's not necessary. It's a dress you'll wear one time and no one will know or care that it cost a large percentage of the budget."
And then I say, "Brain, do you remember how much we loved that dress?? It's my ONE day."
And then we're still confused.

Alas, the dress search continues. I have the information on two to order if I decide.
Guess which one is already out of the running?
That whole appointment was just wishful thinking.

UPDATE!
We spent all of yesterday in Dallas trying on all different types of dresses.
Today, Mom and I decided to stop in David's Bridal just to see what they had.
And guess what???
WE FOUND IT!
We also found the bridesmaids dresses.
This makes it so much more real and I can't freaking wait for John to see it on May 23.
Yay.Yay.YAY!

But first, a little background: John works a couple of jobs. In this day and age, he does right to not talk about work online. So today, I am doing it for him. There's one lady he works with who refuses to discuss anything remotely personal. And I mean anything. It boggles both of our minds.

mrbodygo: why wouldn't you tell anyone how old you are if they asked?
mrbodygo: i don't get it.
mrbodygo: i got it....
mrbodygo: she's an android.
mrbodygo: hundreds of years old
ket7787: brilliant!
mrbodygo: yes. that is the only explaination. if i was an old android housed in a 20-something body i would have to keep my age a secret too.
ket7787: you're cute sometimes
mrbodygo: just sometimes?
ket7787: ok........most of the time
ket7787: but definitely not all the time
mrbodygo: hah fair enough.
mrbodygo: you are cute all the time.
mrbodygo: even when you are having a bad day.

And let me tell you, today was one of those days.
John will always notice, but I do my best to put on a happy face at work and school. But even my classmates noticed it today. So that means something.
Luckily, I have him. I'll always have him and that's a great feeling.

John and I drove down to see mom and Charlie today. It was the first time she'd seen us together since the engagement. She had a little speech prepared which teared me up out of nowhere.

She told John how much she loves me and she can see how much he does, too. She said she expected me to marry a little later in life, but she can see how well we work together and understands. This was where she got me: "You two are the closest I've ever seen to soulmates. I know you're in it for the long run and I couldn't be any prouder.."

I couldn't believe it! She and I have had our difficulties over the years, but I've noticed a change for the [much] better and I love where we are now. I'm so so so so so happy she sees our love and I can't wait to plan this wedding!

If you didn't know, I'm not an easily-offended girl.
Sometimes, something happens and I tell a friend, and she's all, "Oh my gosh, I would have been sooooo pissed! What did you do?" When the thought of being mad about it never crossed my mind.

So, that being said, today a girl offended me. Badly.
And today, one of the first times I can remember, I stood up for myself.

I've never been able to say what I want to say when I need to say it. And today was no different. But I didn't just let it go. I sent this girl a message and told her that I thought her actions were completely inappropriate.

I feel better about myself already.
Although I am expecting a bitter reply, I DON'T CARE!
I said what I wanted to say! It's...liberating.

I'm very much enjoying my internship at BSCENE.
So far, I've written three articles for the next issue and designed a few small promo ads. I've also written numerous captions for photos and event descriptions, and listened to audio clips to get the names to match. There's alot to do and it changes daily, which I enjoy. This week, we started the first round of proofing. We check the copy against the contracts and ad proofs, check for grammar/spelling and other small but noticeable errors. This task is right up my alley and I like it, but I have a pounding headache when I leave at the end of the day.

In other, more important news, John & I have set a date!
Our wedding will be May 23 and the lovely Leah Muse will be our photographer.
I'msofreakingexcited! That's the most important part, in my book.
Well, that and who the groom is, but I think I've made a good decision on that front!

Thursday, John told me he was taking me out to dinner because we hadn't been on date in a while. It's true, so I agreed and didn't think much about it. He took a while finding his wallet in the room before we left, and I was annoyed. Why did that just take so long?

We went to Villa Montez, a fancy Mexican food restaurant we've been wanting to try for months. He told me to order whatever I wanted and we just had a nice dinner together. And I stuffed my face.

We got home and I immediately stripped off my pants and crashed on the bed. I.was.full. Do you get the picture? So, there I am, on the bed, feeling fat. He tells me to get on the computer for some reason, maybe to turn on some music? It took some coaxing, but I did. I wake up my computer and see this as the desktop:



WHAT?? ARE YOU SERIOUS??? I LOVE YOU! WHERE'S THE RING? I'M NOT SUPPOSED TO GET ENGAGED WITHOUT PANTS ON! All those thoughts were going through my head. Some maybe out of my mouth, I'm not sure.

I turned around and kissed him and he took out the ring. "It fits perfectly!"
"We fit perfectly, Karli, and I can't wait to spend the rest of my life and have a family with you.
But...there's one thing you haven't said........"
"Oh, duh.....YES! I thought that was a given."
"No take-backs on this. I don't believe in divorce. We can get through anything."
I believe that with all my heart.

He then proceeds to tell me there was only one other person aware of his plan: my dad. Which caught me by complete surprise. He'd knew that talking to my dad was important to me, but I honestly didn't know if his poor little nerves could handle it. But he did it. For me. Because he loves me.

He put me in charge of telling everyone except his mom. So, there it is.
My last name will be Hetherington within the year. No dates are set, nothing is certain except I'll be spending the rest of my life with him and nothing makes me happier. Except when I realize I have to spell out that monster of a last name for the rest of my life...

*** Peter & Heidi, I want the date to be convenient and accommodating, so we're thinking either spring break or mid-May. Preferences? Don't feel like you have to come. But know that I'd love to have you there and I'm willing to help make it happen!

           yo te quiero mucho                          I love you alot
     mucho mucho mucho                           very, very much
            tanto como entonces                           as much as then
                  siempre hasta morir                           forever until I die

At BSCENE, the telephones have a button you push to record a conversation for interview/note-taking purposes. I've used it twice and it's oh, so handy. BUT I hate hate hate hearing my own voice recorded. I sound like I'm 8-years-old. And I'm not. Will I ever grow out of it? Will I ever sound like a grown woman? Will I ever consider myself a grown woman?

Today at BSCENE, I...

familiarized myself with the office & met most of the staff,
learned the sections of the magazine,
learned the setup of the computers and network,
wrote two tiny blurbs of copy about two events,
proofed two pages,
received two assignments of around 600 words due next Wednesday,
sat in on the afternoon meeting,
made some phone calls to start my assignments.

Busy four hours!

Then I accidentally napped, made a chicken pesto pizza
and John & I went for a bike ride.

Now that I'm all showered up, I plan to lay in bed and watch some recorded television, one of the top five inventions of the last decade in my book. (Or as John would say, IMHO. Because he's goofy like that.)
And so concludes Monday!

I'm officially an intern with BSCENE!
I start Monday!
Hooray!

A turn of events about a month ago led to John & I getting new roommates. Trevor & Amy moved out and the boys of STERLING moved in. Lucky me.

So now I live with four boys. Three bachelors that invite other bachelors over to rearrange my furniture to achieve the utmost comfort to prop up their feet and leave fast food trash and musical instruments strewn about everywhere.

But it's not all bad. Five years ago, I hardly spoke to the boys at school. I never dreamt that I'd live with one, much less five in the near-ish future. But I do. And sometimes they have some charming moments. For instance, I recycle. I encourage them to recycle. Which leads to lots of "Can this be recycled??" and I think it's cute. They're trying. And they like me and value my opinion when it comes to haircuts and wardrobe choices and other equally important decisions.

But sometimes it is bad. I've never been one for parties. Especially not hosting parties. I HATE hosting parties. I don't like worrying about my stuff and cleaning up the mess and having to make people leave when the time comes, which is usually too early in their opinion. So I'm not taking too kindly to being woken up by loud-laughing girls at 3 a.m. when I don't have the luxury of sleeping in until 2 p.m. Who can do that?? How do they do that?!?

Luckily, John agrees that I'm not being bitchy or irrational when I say we need to talk to them about this. We all pay the same amount of rent, so it's just as much their house as it is mine (minus all my furniture and decor), but I think midnight is a reasonable compromise, especially once school rolls around.

Does anyone have any roommate/housemate experience or advice?
It's only for about six more months, but this grandma-in-disguise needs her sleep!

I went in for an interview/meeting with the editors of BSCENE on Tuesday morning. He said I should hear back from them by the end of the week, and to call if I don't. So, today I sent him an email, reminding him that I'm still interested.

Just a moment ago, I answered a phone call and it was the receptionist, asking if I could come in next week between 10:00 and 1:00. Well, of course I can! We settled on Monday at 11:00. I wasn't going to, but I blurted out a question, asking if it was another meeting or...? She said she didn't know. I'll take that.

Then, she called back and said it's an interview with the owner. Yikes!
John & Holly are trying to reassure me via AIM that it's not bad and nothing to be scared about, but I'm already nervous and shaking!

I decided that surely if they wanted to reject me, they'd just ignore me. To call me in to reject me would just be plain mean. So, I've accepted my fate and I will pick another killer outfit and show up with a smile on my face and be on my toes to answer any question he throws at me.

p.s. Just informed of a completly unexpected raise. This brightens my MONTH!

Tuesday, my sister checked herself to the hospital and said she wasn't leaving until they removed her gall bladder. She's been miserable with it for weeks (maybe months?) now and finally took care of it. But, with a sister in the hospital and a husband to look after her, that leaves two precious nephews in need of care. So Aunt K gladly stepped in to volunteer.

I picked up 4-month-old Cole from daycare on Tuesday and went to Dad's for a while, where 3-year-old brother Cameron was swimming. We stayed there for a while and then I took the two kiddos to their house for my temporary little endeavor into motherhood. And let me just say: kudos to all you mamas out there!

I'm not just biased, they really are great kids. I had no major problems with either of them the two nights I kept them. I thoroughly enjoyed my time with those babies. It reassured me that, one day, I can do this whole mommy thing. I'm not saying it's easy, because it's not. The lack of sleep and worrying about whether or not you're doing the right thing for him gets stressful. You don't want this bottle? How about a new diaper? Still no? OK, the bouncy chair? Or not... How about I hold you? Acceptable solution.

My sister is back home with her family tonight, feeling much better. I drove out to check on them earlier and when I got there, Cameron looked at her and said, "I told you!" Apparently he asked her if I was coming tonight and she said no because she was back home and he got sad. Why is it so gratifying to know they love you and want to be around you?

He told me last night as I was putting him in his pajamas, "I love you." The sweetest words on earth.
"I love you, toooo, Cameron!"
"I love you...to the moon and back!"

The things he picks up on. So quickly.
I look forward to the day I'll have my own, but for now I'll settle on being the favorite aunt.

The meeting went well, to my knowledge. It was a bit nervewracking, but I've been through worse...

As far as I can tell, I have the internship if I want it. And I do. There's just one down-side: no paycheck.

Yes, it's an unpaid internship. That, I did not know going into it. What I think I'll be able to do is keep my current job and work for BSCENE about 15 hours a week. For now. When school starts back up, I don't know what I'll do.

I need the experience so bad and it sounds like a wonderful opportunity. They said I'll be able to learn and do, basically, anything I want. They want to help me learn and, in turn, want me to help them publish.

It will all work as it should. They said I should hear from them tomorrow about start dates and such.

I talked to my boss Linda last week. We finally have a competent office worker who is picking up on how we operate around here very quickly. I've decided that if I'm ever going to pursue this journalism thing, I'll just have to get out there and do it. She said she & Ted would give me a great reccommendation with tears and their eyes and that I was always welcome back. They're so good to me.

But, with that done, I submitted an application and resume to BSCENE, a community magazine that covers all sorts of events in the area. Within an hour of sending that, I had an email in my inbox asking when I could come in for a "meeting."

So, here I am. The "meeting" (is that code for interview or are they different?) is tomorrow, Tuesday morning at 10.
Any advice? I'm getting nervous..

I have a great outfit planned, but that's not all it takes. If it were, I would have myself a job at VOGUE. It's just, I tend to stumble over my words when it's important, and I really don't want that to happen! I just want to say the right things and I hope I don't have to take too much of a pay cut to do this thing.

Wish me luck!
I'll let you know how it goes!

As an extra little birthday present to ourselves, John & I bought bicycles on Saturday, in hopes of shaping up and saving a little gas money. We just went to Wal Mart because we're new at this and don't need anything fancy. There were a few expensive Schwinn bikes, but we settled on these his & hers single-speed La Jolla Street Cruisers. Because that's how we roll. Simple. Cute. Fun.

This was before we struck off in the neighborhood to our friend's house:


If I would have had the camera with me upon our arrival, we would have looked...much less thrilled. I never realized how many hills are in this area. And neither of us have exercised in weeks? Months? Too long. I got up the last hill, into her driveway, dropped the bike and thought I was going to vomit. For real. It was around 4:00, probably about 97 degrees out. I'm happy to report we made it back safely. And today we loaded up the bikes and took them to Rose Rudman, a local trail. That was much easier. Far fewer hills. Lots more fun.

I need some streamers. Maybe a basket. Then I'll bike every single day forever.

p.s. For pictures from my 21st celebrations, go here!

What a crazy night!

I planned to drink responsibly because I was supposed to go to class this morning,
but somewhere between two Mai Tais and a shot of sake, I knew that wasn't going to happen.
Then we left Shogun and went to Ricks and thank heaven for John who cut me off.
He took such good care of me and it was the best birthday I've ever had.

But for about three hours this morning, I was singing a different tune...

I had my camera with me, so I'm sure there's an interesting picture or two to go along with this. I'll post them later.

Dear Heidi & Peter:

I found out this afternoon that Justin is engaged. Engaged. He's engaged!
The guy that made a better part of three years of my life miserable, who could hardly commit to a shirt to wear for the day much less a relationship, is now engaged. To a girl he met while living in Arkansas, while I was freezing & gaining 20 pounds with you two lovely people in Chicago.

A select few of my closest friends have tried to provide help.
"Maybe she's pregnant."
"You know his track record."
A sarcastic "that'll last..."
"I saw her. She's...homely-looking."

All of these things help. They do.
And it's not that I'd rather it be me or that I'm sad.
It's just baffling.
I sincerely never thought he'd commit to anyone or anything ever.
That's just the way he is. Was?
Apparently he bought himself a car, has a good, steady job and a fiance.

Maybe I'd like to think that, in a way, I helped him.
Maybe I helped him realize that he had to get his shit together.
That he couldn't be a lonely, bitter, narcissistic asshole forever.

It's just, you see this type of thing on movies all the time. A girl finds out her ex is engaged and freaks out. I never really understood it. Until now. Now I do. It's just weird. Or as Lauren would say, "Bananas."

I firmly believe that everything has a purpose.
Had I not "dated" him for so long, I wouldn't appreciate John nearly as much.
I also wouldn't know some of the people who are now my very close friends.
Everything has a way of working out in the best way possible, and it's so clear in retrospect.

Justin & I never were going to work. This I know. I should have known it long before I did.
I'm more happy than I ever was with him. I trust John with my life and, more importantly, with my heart.